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Valemont - MTV's Shortest Supernatural Series Debuts Tonight!

MTV really knows their audience. Who watches them? People who think The Hills, The City, Laguna Beach, et al are non-scripted reality tv shows.  They're short on intellect, long on lemming-like behavior, and once plunked in front of that channel, they haven't the strength to hit the remote to watch something challenging.

Playing into their lack of depth, MTV is debuting a scripted, supernatural mystery series that will run exactly two and a half minutes (2:30) between the season premiere of The Hills and The City. Whether or not people will be able to distinguish the show from a long form advert is anyone's guess.

Here's the plot -Sophie (pictured),  our heroine infiltrates the elitist Valemont (I keep calling it Valmont- de Laclos would slap me) University trying to find out the why and how of Eric, her older brother's disappearance. She also uncovers family histories and other spooky things. Along the way she meets the archetypes we have grown to love and hate. The spoiled rich bitch, the Adonis,  The Cruel Jokester, etcetera, etcetera. Sounds like Hex meets Skins meets Medium. After the debut on TV, the 23 concluding episodes will be found on-line at MTV.com

Kristen Hager is Sophie

Eric Balfour is Eric Balfour

Other cast members include Nikki Blonsky, Dillon Casey,  and Jessica Parker Kennedy.

The website is interactive, and you, yes you, can enroll in the Uni! Who knows what you'll find walking across the quad.

Are you going to watch it? Do you think this is dumb?

Fashion's Night Out - Get Ready to Rumble

Fashion's Night Out is on September 19, 2009.  Vogue, CFDA, and New York & Company have come together and organized the New York City event. If you haven't heard of the event, it's a one night global initiative to get people out of the house and spend, spend, spend. September 10, is also the first day of Mercedes Benz New York Fashion Week. There will be a lot of exhausted and delirious fashion people in the streets that night.

As you can imagine, almost every store has an event going on. Here's my list of stores that I think would be fun to visit.

Macy's Herald Square is having a boatload of events- Michael Kors and Debra Messing Will be making an appearance to promote Micheal's newest fragrance, Very Hollywood. Tommy Hilfiger is hosting a performance of the Michael Freo Jazz Trio. You can meet designer Rachel Roy and Jewelry.com is debuting a collection inspired by the iconic images of New York City; The Brooklyn Bridge, Grand Central and more.

Barneys New York (Mad & 61S t) has the mayor, Manolo Blahnik, Brian Reyes, Thom Browne and other celebs making appearances. Yes there will be drinks and nibbles.

Rebecca Taylor (260 Mott Street bet Prince & Houston) is combing glamorous, feminine, sexy clothing with a cotton candy machine! How cool is that??!!

Nine West (675 5th & 53 St) is launching their new Nine West Vintage America Collection and the Vintage America Voices Contest that night. They're collecting gently used footwear for Soles4Souls. Look for appearances by Miranda Lee Richards (Singer/songwriter and Nine West VAC brand ambassador), Fred Allard (Nine West Creative Director), Tiffany Johnson (Soles4Souls spokesperson and musician).

MAC Cosmetics (113 Spring Street & Mercer) will have performer Jonelle Manae will be making a personal appearance and DJ Harley Viera-Newton will spin. Other MAC stores -148 Columbus Ave- DJ Chelsea Leyland, 175 Fifth Ave - DJ Lola Schnabel, Macy's Herald Square - DJ Lady Starlight, Macy's Rego Park - TBA .

To get the full checklist, visit Fashion's Night Out website.

*photo by PJ Gach

More VH1 Reality Shows in Your Future

C'mon, admit it, as much as you can't stand reality shows, you just keep watching them. It's like slowing down when you see an accident; it may be horrible, but it's fascinating too.

VH1 in their infinte wisdom-um, didn't they learn anything from the Megan Wants A Millionaire debacle, will giving viewers more, not less reality shows in the near future. Here's their fall line up:

Eddie Griffin: Going for Broke - premieres September 14, 2009. We get to watch a comedian with eight children and five exes try to make alimony and child support.

Tough Love:Season Two - premieres November 15, 2009. More desperate, neurotic women in search of a man, not sanity. BTW- it premieres on my birthday....hint....hint.

Sex Rehab With Dr.Drew -premieres November 1, 2009. Hmm, is there anything this man is not an expert of?  I mean, really. Is he going to be the host of a show for the style challenged next?

I Want to Work for Diddy:Season Two - premieres November 2, 2009. We get to watch more people debase themselves for a job. How many meldowns per episode is the burning question.

Celebrity Rehab With Dr. Drew - premieres January 10, 2010. See! See! Ah well, we get to see more of his tie collection.

Oh no, I'm not immune to the strangeness that is reality television. Come Thursday nights I am glued to Bravo for their Real Housewives franchise. Atlanta and New Jersey are tied for all-time crassness. As much as their behavior boggles my mind, I can't help watching the insanity unfold. Being a NY'er, I've bumped into Alex McCord at a few events and am convinced she'll go to the opening of an envelope.

Ah well, if they're going to keep pumping them out, why can't they document my search for a sane single man who makes me laugh?